Useless Objects I Wish I'd Invented
You know the ones I'm talking about. Those stupid informercial products. Like Snuggies. There's the Original Snuggie, Couple Snuggie, Dog Snuggie (does Snuggie hate cats?), Football Team Snuggie, Kid Snuggie, Leopard Print Snuggie (so sexy Rawr), Baseball Team Snuggie, Designer Snuggie (available in monkey print, cloud print or for the really hardcore: skull and crossbones print!). And for God's sake, there's even a Harry Potter Snuggie. Even I wouldn't be caught dead in that. What the hell is wrong with these people? Who invented this damn thing? It was meant to be a joke right? Please, please tell me it was.
And don't forget the imitation Snuggies. There's the Slanket! And the nightmare called the Peekaru. This is how the aliens will invade, I promise you. And the Forever Lazy which comes with a convenient butt flap (butt flap photo source). And Pajama Jeans. Why couldn't I come up with this shit? I'd be a freaking bazillionaire.